By Selena Hicks
Self-care is defined as the practice of taking an active role in protecting one’s own well-being and happiness, especially during periods of stress. It keeps us from burning out, feeling like we are worn too thin, or feeling like we are living in a constant state of irritability, depression, or anxiousness. When one thinks of “self-care” often what comes to mind are things like a new haircut, a spa day, or treating ourselves to something nice. It can absolutely be all of those things but it is a lot more and something that can be practiced daily.
Self-care is something that many people who have experienced trauma feel they don’t deserve. It can be really hard to be nice to yourself when you feel unworthy. Self-care is effective in helping people who have experienced trauma strengthen and begin to care for themselves and heal. Starting small, can lead to large and impactful changes in how we see ourselves and live our lives. It can involve being mindful of a really delicious meal you are eating, spending an extra 2 minutes in the shower, or checking in with yourself throughout your day. It is about paying attention, being grounded and present, and considering yourself. In addition, it is about doing things that we may not enjoy but are actually good for us and our health in the long run. If we dread the gym but know exercise is important, it might mean going for a long walk and working our way up to a gym visit, making small adjustments to ensure that we are taking care of ourselves to our best ability.
Self-care is not the same as self-repair. Self-repair can often be activities we do that feel like self-care to help take care of ourselves after something stressful to get us back online. But self-repair differs in that it is not always healthy activities we do to recover. Self-repair can involve things like going to sleep after a hard day, drinking a glass of wine or two to relax, or eating when we feel stressed to calm us down. It gets the job done and can feel really good for us in the moment but it is not always the most beneficial for ourselves and our health. To change self-repair activities to self-care activities, we focus on our well-being. Building a connection with ourselves through grounding techniques and mindfulness can then assist in building healthy connections with others in the future.
Over time a daily practice of self-care can help us strengthen, grow, and enhance our surroundings. If you are interested in assessing your personal self-care routine the link below will take you to an easy and free assessment:
https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/self-care-assessment